The last two weeks have passed in a bit of a haze. We’ve moved, painted, restored, moved again, unpacked some of our stuff and tried to work out where to put stuff in a place with a whole lot less storage than the last. We’ve had the help of amazing friends and family. The American family even came over to do some painting (I’m not sure that was the weekend we had planned with them but it was the weekend we got and it was lovely to see them).
And so we are here.
We are here in this land of suburban living. We are here in this land of birdsong as I go to sleep and wake up each morning. We are here in this vast sea of green as I gaze and gaze out of our bedroom window at the South Downs basking in all their glory in front of me. We are here in this place of three bedrooms, son2 is out of our room and sleeping mostly in his cot. We are here in this place of son1 asking, ‘when we get bunka beds?’. We are here with this kitchen not like our last and still trying to work out where to put things and manage until we can afford to replace it. We are here in this large living space, delighted that it holds 15 people for soup and bread and talking of reality. We are here with this garden, mowed lawn and small house for the tiny people to play in. We are here in this land of, we could just do that, or that or this. This land of, oh if we only had that it would be better. We are here in this land of endless tasks but limited funds. We are here in this slightly shabby but being redeemed slowly slowly slowly over time world. (and that’s us as well as the house…)
We are here.
Being me I’ve been in a dark place for the last few days as my head is wrapping itself around the change. The black dog always pounces at such times and so, despite the joys and gratitude of this new world I’ve been slow and weary and exhausted. Having to make new decisions about the details of our days, from where the nappies are kept to how we get to the park, tired me out. My body gave out on me and new aches, from moving and carrying the small but heavy ones, were found.
Today the sun is shinning, the boys are napping at the same time (gasp) and I feel slightly human again. Having small group from church over last night helped me grasp again the vision of increased hospitality that we have for this place and reminded me that hospitality doesn’t come out of perfection but out of what little or much we have offered in grace. Baking bread and making soup in our not so perfect kitchen helped restore me to the simplicity of giving others grace in this house rather than showing off sleek new shiny stuff.
Son1 is more than a little like me and also finds change hard, his boundary fighting ways have returned and I’m trying to find ways of helping him enjoy the new space. We need to sort out the boy’s play corner in our living space so they can make the most of their toys again. Son1’s bedroom feels very similar and we’ve been spending lots of time in there as he tries to figure out this new world. As both of us navigate a week of total routine, doing all our normal things but in a different way we are slowly returning to enjoying life again. Son2, well, he just smiles at things and loves the extra crawling space.
A few years ago when we moved to our flat we did lovely little new address cards, time has moved on and I have no idea who I would send them to now. Who even has an address book anymore? Anyway. If you do and would like our address just email me/facebook/some other verb of our time me.