This one’s a question for you all. Lets get some interaction going on this blog for a bit eh? I’d love to say, once a week lets just chat about something but you know how it goes, I’ll look at this post in a years time and think, what happened to that resolution…
Anyways my question of the day is… “Should life be fair?”
I find myself most grumpy when I think life hasn’t been fair to me, when I’ve changed 4 pooey nappies in one day and husbandface hasn’t had to change one. When I’ve been up 5 times a night and he’s been up once. I find myself feeling most awkward when I have had more rest than him, when I’ve had more quiet time to myself than him. When I have more cake than him. I struggle to enjoy these times if I don’t think they are fair, that I haven’t earnt them.
I struggled lots over the holiday because husbandface has had a bad back, his painkillers knocked him out loads and I had to do more than I usually would in the holidays. I have been grumpy and complaining because of this.
I want to accept that life isn’t fair, that it’s ok for us each to be more sacrificial in different times in our marriage and in life. I want to rejoice because God never said things were going to be fair, he just asks us to love deeply and widely because he has loved us in ways beyond fairness. His love is not fair. It is not fair of him to keep on loving me despite the many ways I throw that love back in his face. But still the voice keeps nagging away. It’s not fair.
Anyone got any thoughts on the matter?
The Long Walk Home 
No comments as such, but I know where you’re coming from. It’s not fair I have to look after J most of the weekend while S is with October son or doing Church things, but then he works hard in a stressful job so why shouldn’t he have a break, and why wouldn’t I want to spend more time with my son. A constant battle I have in my head
Yeah it’s a battle isn’t it – I sometimes think I need to give up the whole concept of fairness but can’t think how to!
Probably before the fall life was fair. Maybe we weren’t created to cope with not fair originally, like we weren’t created to cope with sickness and death. Do we battle against it because it was never meant to be like that?
Interesting… I think maybe we weren’t made to worry about fairness… instead we were created to love richly, generously and deeply and not worry about whether we were getting any in return (probably because we were also recipients of such love as well as givers) the fall knocks all that out and makes me demand to be loved before loving… hmmm
I’ve been thinking about this recently in terms of housework. It doesn’t feel fair that I’m the only one who ever cleans the bathroom, for instance. But then I also think that to Laurence it probably doesn’t feel fair that he’s the one going out to work each day (actually, I know for a fact he wouldn’t exchange with me!). Then there’s the question – does it have to be fair? Thinking about the early Christians doing life together, each gave what they could. Maybe that’s all we can ask of ourselves and each other?