I’ve been re-reading my old Christmas blog posts (it’s Christmas eve in the office ok, there is nothing else to do..). It’s been a tour down memory lane, of remembering things that once were, good times had and all the ways God uses this time of year to step into my hard stubborn old heart and soften me to the wonder of Him.
Last night in our house was no exception to this theme. We had house Christmas, lots of presents, Larry’s amazing roast dinner, Kevin’s slightly scary present he got from his secret Santa at work and lots of fun and wine. Half way through we put down our knives and forks and read out John 1 in four different versions of the Bible. (even I can’t call the word on the street a translation 🙂 What stuck out like a large neon sign in my heart was the middle bit, where it says He came to his own and they did not recognise Him, He came to the ones He spoke into being and they turned away from Him. Heart wrenching, soul gutting stuff. How stupid and yet a perfect description of our messed up lives. Rejecting the One who called us into being, turning from the spring of living water and prefering the darkness.
And yet He came. Residing with us. Emmanuel, the word guarateed to sweep through my dark hard heart full of jealously, pride and bitterness. The word that is stamped all the way down to the scum at the bottom of the pit I attempt to hide from all. Emmanuel, God with us. Jesus come to earth.
Jesus has come and Jesus is the name that calms our fears, Jesus is God with us, Jesus the Light, the Word, the Hope of all, Jesus is my friend, my Lord, Jesus is the one who leads me to my Daddy, Jesus is the one who sees through my pretences, my lies, my hopes, my fears, my joys and is my peace. That’s what had me in tears once again last night as we cried out to Him in gratitude, sorrow, awe and joy.